The Gift of Reflection

I sat on my porch yesterday evening, reflecting over my life and where I am today. I do this quite often...sometimes too much. On yesterday, my thoughts were consumed with how many mistakes I have made and how many times I almost made more but didn't by God's grace. It wasn't long before my husband joined me on this thought provoking journey and we started to talk about these mistakes and how they have shaped us into who we are today, at this very moment. I explained to him that I am in a place in my life that I have stopped trying to please everyone. I am solely trying to just please God. This new direction has led me to embrace some people, places and things that I wouldn't normally and it has also allowed me to let go of some people, places and things that I couldn't on my own. 

You see, I have a quite a few gifts. Some of my most strongest include being sensitive and empathetic, a forgiver, and the discernment of spirits. I am the person that can tell when something is wrong and will cry with you because I can feel your pain as if it were my own. I am also the girl that forgives easy and moves on to a higher road in any relationship. However, above these gifts is my ability to try the spirit by the spirit. Because of my sensitivity and discernment, I can tell when someone genuinely cares and loves me and means what they say or unfortunately means me no good or are a wolf in sheep's clothing.  These are very heavy gifts to carry sometimes because I don't always want to feel others pain and I don't always want to know people's true intentions. Nonetheless, it is my cross that I must bear and I must find ways to use it for the glory of the Kingdom.

"My heart is glad to be in this new space." This is what I told my husband while we chatted on the porch. I don't expect much from man. I don't look for validation from my friends and family by trying to please them anymore. I am who I am because of life experiences and how God made me. I came from where I came from because that was how it was suppose to be. I am not ashamed of anything in my past. I am no different than the next sinner who is seeking redemption from a merciful God. I am happy to be in this new space with my husband, children and God realizing they are all I need in order to be happy with me. I love you all!

 

1 John: 4

Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world. Hereby know ye the Spirit of God: Every spirit that confesseth that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh is of God:

And every spirit that confesseth not that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh is not of God: and this is that spirit of antichrist, whereof ye have heard that it should come; and even now already is it in the world.Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.

They are of the world: therefore speak they of the world, and the world heareth them.We are of God: he that knoweth God heareth us; he that is not of God heareth not us. Hereby know we the spirit of truth, and the spirit of error.

Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love. In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him.

Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another. No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us. Hereby know we that we dwell in him, and he in us, because he hath given us of his Spirit.

Herein is our love made perfect, that we may have boldness in the day of judgment: because as he is, so are we in this world.There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. We love him, because he first loved us.

If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen? And this commandment have we from him, That he who loveth God love his brother also.